Mr X
Street … … …
77 777 P. ..
P. .. on 19/10/00
Madame, Monsieur,
I wish to apply for site engineering business, you have posted on the site ……com.
Why this job interests me there? I think it would operate all the skills I have acquired in the past. If my studies (OTC Industrial Computing) gave me the knowledge and technical know-how, my first professional experiences successively Dell and Microsoft, have given me extra knowledge in marketing. In both companies, I have indeed worked in the post-sales and consultancy. I think today that a fairly versatile, capable of mastering both the technical aspects, with my engineering degree and business strategies. On the other hand, two long stays abroad (6 months in the United States, and 4 months in England) I was familiar with a language and culture different from ours. I think it would be a plus in an international company like yours. Besides, I developed a great capacity to adapt to a foreign environment.
My salary requirements amount to 230 KF per year, which seems reasonable given my background.
Hoping to have more from you soon.
Best regards.
Form Tips
The letter is direct and short, two advantages to this type of communication. It exudes a feeling of youth and vitality that can, given the type of position referred to, constitute a real advantage.
However, the general style is not appropriate to approach the company. Examples: The word up in business engineering indicates a cultural shift with the demands we are entitled to expect a candidate for such a function. He should have used the word function or mission.
I think he exploited all, this formulation betrays a poor command of French, we should say in this case I think this feature would allow me to use the skills acquired in the past.
It is the same formula for the conclusion of the paragraph on security: Replace claims and demands by the light of my journey through: what seems to be the value of my professional experience.
Tips background
We would have liked better understand what lies behind the evocation of technical knowledge, additional knowledge, post sales services. Without giving an exhaustive analysis of his career, Mr. X should have given some specific and tangible insights of what he says.
Despite the reservations mentioned below, one can appreciate the section devoted to visits made by the candidate abroad. This letter is part of concrete, specific, and is, therefore, proof of his ability to speak the language and adapt to different contexts.
The major error:
The letter is not specific enough, resulting in a feeling of soft focus on the professional background of the candidate.